Life observations

I saw a similar list about life, however, I had a bit of a different slant on the whole thing.  I thought I would put my two cents worth in. 

Things we aren't taught in school

1. No one cares about you as much as you do.
2. Life isn't fair. Fair to one person, isn't always fair to another. Also, whining about it won't help. Rarely will anyone ask you how you feel about what happened.So what? Your self-esteem belongs to you, build it from within. Be the kind of person that you admire. 
3. Success is dependent on you and thousands of other people.  In this reference I'm talking about career success.To be on top, others have to follow you.At the very least, others have to care about what you are doing.
4. No matter how shy you are, you have to connect to the real world. It is next to impossible to function without connecting with someone. To really operate in society, you must connect to many. 
5. Life can be tough. Teachers are only the beginning. Wait till you get a boss who dangles that paycheck over your head in return for menial tasks. You have to perform for less than likable people, deal with it. Of course, always know it is only a step in the process. Remember, you don't drown by being under the water, you drown by staying there. 
6. Don't be humiliated when you have to do something you consider beneath you in order to eat. All work is valid and can lead to other opportunities. The CEO isn't necessarily a better or smarter person than the burger flipper at McDonald's. Actor Jack Nicholson was "discovered" while working in the mail room at MGM
7. Stop blaming your boss, job, spouses, etc. for everything that's wrong in your life. You can see your experiences as anchors or the clay that made you who you are today. You have the choice to be what you want to be. Hating someone is like taking poison, expecting the other person to die. Spinning your wheels in the mud of self pity won't help you move forward. You can either accept the person in your life who holds you back, move on or deal with it. If you have been walked over, get back up and walk on. You can also try showering the oppressor with love and overwhelm him/her.  At the very least, they will be confused enough to stop, if only for a little while. Doors are there for a reason when the heat is too great.
8. Stop blaming your parents. Your parents are individuals too. There's a good chance that they were learning right along side you as you grew up. They have dreams, ideas and opinions independent of you. They may be older but they are not always as senile as you might think.
9. Life goes on and on and on until it doesn't. Savor it. Yes, life can be depressing. People can be  a pain. Remember, someday, if you're lucky, you will realize how great it was to be younger or where you are right now. 
10. Personal success can't be gauged by wealth or career. You are successful if you raised kids who become responsible, contributing adults. You are successful if someone loves you for who you are. You are successful if you are happy and content. Success in the eyes of others doesn't matter because, generally, people are gauging themselves in relation to you in order to feel better (or worse).Do you really need their admiration or scorn as the case may be?
11. Be nice to nerds. They are the great thinkers who power the world's infrastructure. Oh, yeah, they may be your boss someday.
12. Don't judge people on the surface. Everyone has a story. The cover rarely divulges the novel within. You may be surprised to discover the layers underneath, once you get to know a person. 
13. Don't wait until your death bed to say I'm sorry or I love you. Also, don't die with regrets. Its never too late, really it isn't. Look at Betty White, she isn't quitting even though she's in her 80's. George Burns  contributed well in to his nineties. 

What do you want?

Social networking is great for people who want to connect to other people for a variety of reasons. It may be they have too much time on their hands or they are lonely. It is also a big conduit for those who have something to connect to those who want something. Writers, marketers, politicians, satirists, etc. all have "something" they want people to have. Those who are seeking for something to have may stumble upon those who are giving. It is a nice symbiotic relationship. The thing is, what is it you really want? What is it you really have? I mean REALLY. Sometimes what we think we want isn't always what we need. Thinking outside the proverbial box helps us clarify our goals. It also gives an avenue for creativity. You know what you want, now decide what you need. Here's to connecting on many different levels while at the same time fulfilling all of our hopes and dreams.

National Library Week

It is time, once again, to honor our libraries. Go ahead and check out a book or DVD at your local library. Author Neil Gaiman is the honorary chair for this event. It amazes me how libraries tend to be forgotten. They have such a rich source of material available for free. Many libraries across the country are having events this week. Even after this event has come and gone, don't forget your local library. They exist because of those who check out material and patronize the library. If no one bothered to check anything out or just stayed away, they would eventually lose their funding. I know of a one-horse-town, not far from my neck of the woods, which has a one room library. It was created by a lady who wanted to promote reading. She donated the first books and housed them in a small shot gun style house. Since then, some odd 40 years ago, the library still exists. The local school, citizens of the town and the current Caretaker, have supported it and had fundraisers in order to keep it alive. There is a place in Kansas that claims to have the smallest US Library. The library I was referring to was at least as small as the one in Kansas. The smallest library in the world is in South Britain. They converted a telephone booth into a library of sorts. People actually wait in line to check out a book there. I believe, even with the electronic books becoming all the rage, that the good old paper and binding will still prevail. I have electronic books on my Ipod but I still house a plethora of wonderful ink and paper books. I don't have to worry about charging the batteries or having my electronic device with me. I can always grab my latest read and take it anywhere. There's something special about the smell and feel of a real book.
So, honor your library, no matter how small. It exists to serve, even if it isn't always appreciated. The smallest of libraries are even more special as they must live amidst technology. To me, they serve as a reminder of how a group of people, no matter how small, can do great things.

Imagine a library

Here's a link to another place where there is a contest going on. Laurie King wants you to imagine what your "perfect" library would look like. What would it contain (besides books)? I've seen many a beautiful library and know exactly what I would like. The contest is for a "public library" but I have my personal library already planned out. It would have dark cherry walls which meet midway with deep red fabric walls. The shelves would be very classical and massive. The obligatory ladder on wheels would allow the reader to access the higher shelves There would be comfortable velvet seating with gorgeous stained glass lamps. The ambiance would be welcoming and soothing. It would have carved wood tables with matching chairs. There may be a tapestry hanging, depicting some medieval scene. My library would be a combination of Victorian, renaissance and classical styles. Of course, being in the 21st century, it would also contain modern technology. Wi-Fi and and an mp3 player with a sound system would allow me to play background music at my discretion. Since it is obvious that I love books, creating an imaginary library is an easy thing for me to do. Alas, the next thing to do is to create a real one.

Competition

I've observed many things throughout my life. One thing, more than most, is that human beings are competitive. I don't necessarily mean in a business sense either. Sure, that is one area that involves competition and is necessary. However, I've noticed that if you break down the art of gossip, (it is an art) you see the fundamentals of competitiveness at its basic form. Usually, gossip consists of discussing what is wrong or negative about someone else, though not always. At the heart of these negative observations and/or opinions is competition. Many people either have underlying feelings of inferiority or superiority, take your pick. They want to come out on top of the heap. They do not want their lifestyles analyzed but have no problem analyzing some one else. I can honestly say that I have been drawn into such conversations. In the past I would just nod my head and agree rather than start an argument. Then I went through the stage of standing up for what I believed. I would defend the person or cause being accused by asking what proof the accuser had. I can say one thing for sure, that was a waste of time. People will believe what they want and no amount of facts can change this. Just look at the last election for proof of this. I always said, "don't sell your soul" to anyone just to avoid an argument. The fact is, some people love to argue. I have finally come to the conclusion that its ok to live and let live. Of course, you should obviously not be passive to abuse or overt injustices that are harmful. Just, pick you battles carefully. Words are words and can only hurt you if you allow them to. If you know that you are doing your very best and not hurting anyone, that's all you can do. It doesn't matter what anyone else may think. This takes me back to the subject of competition. It has been discovered that the most successful people were those who did what they loved to do. They followed their passions without regard to what other people did. They succeeded, not because they were better, but because they did their best. There are so many talented, passionate people out there. The ones that stand out are those who focus on their craft rather than what their "competition" was doing. That weeds out the negative, self defeating energy and leaves them with the beautiful talent which gave birth to their ideas in the first place. There's always someone with more ______________(fill in the blank) but not someone better at being you! Everyone has a story. So focus on your passions and see the beauty in everyday life!

Our world

We build our world from the inside out. Everything we see, interact with and what we believe makes up our world. We decide what it is we want to be. But first we must decide who we are. You can choose to believe what others say you are or you can believe what you want (be it good or bad). I hear people say "I'm bad at math" or "I'm an excellent cook" or "I'm thin/fat", etc. The bottom line is, you tend to be exactly what you believe yourself to be. Now you can say, "I'm just looking at reality." Reality to one person may not be reality to another. For example, when it snows, one person can see the beauty in the white landscape. Another person will only see the slippery streets which can be dangerous to drive on. Its the same reality to both persons.
There have been studies conducted that show people who think more positively are happier than those who think more negatively. On the surface, that makes sense. However, when another study was conducted, it showed that positive thinkers were actually having better "luck" than the negative thinkers. In effect, they were creating their reality from the inside out. Cancer patients with longer survival rates are the ones who are taught positive visualizations and meditation.
The recent HBO movie Temple Grandin is an excellent example of people making up their own minds about what is real and what isn't. Temple is autistic. Because her educated mother refused to follow the doctor's advice and institutionalize her, Temple received an education. Temple is now a grown woman with a doctorate. She now speaks on behalf of autism issues. She is also an animal behaviorist. Because Temple was educated, she learned not to accept the world's vision of her. She saw events as a door which she could open. Society tends to close doors to those with autism and learning disabilities. Temple teaches that everyone learns differently and as such everyone needs to be taught differently. Temple Grandin has several books that should be checked out. Also, here is a video.
Today's schools attempt to teach every child in the same way. As a result, some kids are left on the sidelines.
What does all this tell us? First, it shows that it is up to each individual to decide who they want to be. Second, it shows us that once we decide, we must not stray from our vision. If you want to succeed, you must realize that you do indeed create your reality from the inside out. If you have a disability, you must look beyond it. You can use it as a tool to greater things or move on to a higher purpose. It truly is up to each person. For good or bad we are all on this planet trying to live our lives. No one greater than the other.
So, are you a writer, doctor, speaker, etc? Are you more than one thing? It is up to you. Circumstances can either stop you or be overcome. They can help you or hinder you. It is up to you.

J.D. Salinger will be remembered by his book.

"Catcher in the Rye" author J. D. Salinger has died at age 91 in New Hampshire.

The AP states: "He had lived for decades in self-imposed isolation in the small, remote house in Cornish, N. H."

I always find media statements like that rather odd. I heard the late Paul Harvey state that Barbara Streisand had agoraphobia. He stated that she hid behind closed doors and was afraid to leave her home. Famous people are stalked, hounded and bothered. Naturally they are going to shy away from the privacy-invading public. It doesn't necessarily make them hermits or agoraphobics. At the same time, Salinger openly admitted that he cherished his privacy. So do I, yet I am not afraid of getting out. So, let's move on.

Salinger's only successful novel, The Catcher in the Rye, was published in 1951 and gradually achieved a status of fame which he chose not to participate in. That book became a coming of age story for many an adolescent and disgruntled youth. The Catcher in the Rye with its immortal teenage protagonist - the twisted, rebellious Holden Caulfield - came out during the time of anxious, Cold War conformity. Salinger wrote for adults, but teenagers all over the world identified with the novel's themes of alienation, innocence and fantasy.

In later years, Salinger become famous for not wanting to be famous, refusing interviews. If you might wonder why he chose solitude, check out a pursuer of the famed author who searched him out. Actually, to his credit, the literary afficiado did not disturb Mr. Salinger. Nonetheless, many before him have. Let us leave Salinger's memory to the ages. His literary contribution stands for itself.